One Photo # 77, My Life in 10,000 Steps

Those of you who really know me will testify that I'm not a gadget guy.  Fact is...technology scares me.  I actually bought my phone because I needed a phone.  So, it's obvious that I had to have been given this Fitbit piece of machinery.  I finally decided to put the thing on and get some help to make it work.  Now,  I can be made painfully aware of my sloth like lifestyle each and every minute of the day.  Not what I had hoped to be reminded of believe me.  Where did this 10,000 steps torture setting come from anyway?  Who decided I needed to move my body 10,000 steps a day?  I can asure you that moving my body is much more difficult than moving yours.  It's a simple max density equation.  No math here don't worry.  Simplified:  My wheel barrow is more full than yours.  I even saw online today, while I was working up to taking another step, on ways to cheat on the steps meter.  Really?  It's true.  I'm sure some of you have a few ways to hit the buzzer too but it occurred to me that I do have a few  favorites.

Cheaty Ways to Beat the Bit

1.  It takes approximately 87 steps to kill a La Crema Chardonnay bottle.  If you open it yourself it's even better.  Add a couple if you have to get up to get it out of the refrigerator.

2.  Taking a shower.  Yes, I know...it's only water resistant.  But you can knock off about 97 steps with a good shampoo.  Stop...I"m not going there.

3.  101 Steps can be achieved by shaking my famous Mexican Martini recipe. If you go vigorous on it.  Ok.  I might have thrown in a few Samurai lime cuts to buck up the number but it's close.

4. 113 Steps on a full Hokey Pokey.  No video today.

5. Zero steps for that one.  Unless you got the cat of nine tails out.   Might be available on the upgrade?

6. 954 Steps to wash one large Ambulance and one rescue vehicle.  Considering you really aren't taking many steps on this one,  it's a nice perk.

I'm sure some of you have more so let me know.  Please cheat with some dignity.  Last week I saw a women tourist here, get up from the porch.  Go to the parking lot and just wave her arms around for a minute.  A sad sight but I now understand the quest for the wiggling wrist ogre flashing your praises.  Go forth and move something.